Tuesday, March 14, 2006

That's Entertainment

Oh man, that is so fucking funny. Cracks me up every fucking time I see it. That's the funniest part of the whole fucking video! There's nobody in the entire fucking world who could watch that and not piss themselves laughing. Probably shit themselves too, it's that fucking funny. It's fucking hilarious.

General Pace! You're not laughing as hard as I am. And you're not laughing as hard at this bit as you were earlier. Let me tell you here and now that the pyramid of naked sand niggers and Lyndie England pointing at them is far funnier than the Iraqi being sodomized with a light-stick that you seemed to find so funny. That's not just my opinion, that is my direct order as Secretary of Defense and as your superior. You will find the human pyramid the funniest part of the entire fucking video or I'll do to you what I did to Shinseki. Capiche?

Sunday, March 05, 2006

The Meaning of "Is"

Once upon a time, a popular and competent President was taken to task by Republicans for attempting to evade full disclosure by a careful selection and parsing of the words he used: the famous "it depends what the meaning of 'is' is." I believe that Bush's handlers parse the speeches they write for im in a similar manner before attempting to beat them into his moronic head with a baseball bat.

Bush said: "I don't think anybody anticipated the breach of the levees." and is now being pilloried [link is to WaHoPo article, registration required but is free and you can give a fake e-mail address to avoid spam] (and he damned well should be pilloried, if not hanged) because of a tape that surfaced showing that many of his minions did anticipate a breach of the levees. But it all depends what the meaning of "anticipate" is...

Check out this dictionary entry for anticipate.

Meaning 1: To feel or realize beforehand; foresee: hadn't anticipated the crowds at the zoo.

It is quite clear from the tape that his minions had anticipated the breach of the levees in this sense.

Meaning 3: To deal with beforehand; act so as to mitigate, nullify, or prevent: anticipated the storm by boarding up the windows.

It is quite clear from what transpired that nobody in the higher levels of the administration anticipated the breach of the levees in this sense.

So there we have it. A lot of people, Bush included, anticipated [foresaw] the breach of the leveees but nobody anticipated [mitigated, nullified, or prevented] the breach of the levees.

Bush told the literal truth. And so did Clinton. Nobody died when Clinton used English carefully in an attempt to cover up getting a BJ and spewing his jizm over a blue dress, but they impeached him anyway. Hundreds died when Bush decided he didn't give a shit about poor blacks in New Orleans...

Thursday, March 02, 2006

Let Me Eat Cake!

And so the real truth behind Katrina has come out [link requires New York Times registration but it's free to register]. Many of us already suspected it based on what we knew of Bush's past behaviour. In fact many of us were damned certain of it because Bush is consistently dishonest, crooked and looks after nobody but number one. But now the videos have surfaced and not even the shit-for-brains Bush supporters can defend their chimpanzee. If the Democrats don't have the intelligence and the balls to turn this into a major issue then you can write off the United States.

See this timeline for the full gory details. Highlights of the chimpanzee's inadequacy follow:

August 28th: Bush was warned that Katrina would be a disaster by the National Hurricane Center Director and did absolutely fucking nothing.

August 29th: Bush had a photo op with John McCain and ate some of McCain's birthday cake.

August 30th: Katrina wrecked New Orleans. Bush partied on by playing guitar with country singer Mark Willis.

September 1st: Bush LIED and said "I don't think anybody anticipated the breach of the levees."

September 2nd: Bush finally got off his arse and did something related to hurricane Katrina. That's right, he flew overhead on Air Force One for another fucking photo op.

Actual useful help came far later, and was bungled, and is still being bungled. But, of course, Halliburton is making out like bandits with no-bid reconstruction projects.

As a side-note, if Brownie's story is true (and who can believe anything said by anyone in the Bush administration?), despite being an idiot who got fired from his last job for incompetence, he actually showed far more leadership than Bush. He claims that he told his subordinates to do whatever was necessary, to "bend the rules" if they had to, and he'd take the blame if anybody complained. Yeah, he'd expect that as long as the rule-bending was for justifiable reasons he'd get away with it. Yeah, he'd expect that minor rule-breaking would be ignored even if it were unjustifiable. Yeah, he'd expect that even major rule-breaking that was unjustifiable would be glossed over by a President greatful for pulling his stones out of the fire provided the overall result were satisfactory. But he'd also know that if things went drastically wrong then he'd have to take the blame. And he might also suspect that he'd be made the scapegoat for just about anything if doing so would protect Bush. Nevertheless, if his tale is true, he showed true leadership by shielding his subordinates at risk to himself and by risking his career (and even liberty) in order to expedite matters.

If the Democrats cannot take advantage of all that they should be taken out and shot. Seriously. Bush has committed far worse crimes, and if left in power will commit even more (and possibly even worse still) crimes, but this is enough to destroy him (if the Democrats can be bothered). I'm no media type, but how about this:

The scene is a royal palace in France. A courtier approaches Marie Antoinette and says: "Your majesty, there is a bread shortage. The poor are starving." Antoinette replies "Let them eat cake."

The scene is Bush and McCain at McCain's birthday celebration. An actor imitates McCain's voice and says "Your majesty, your courtiers warned you yesterday that Hurrican Katrina would destroy New Orleans and today it has come to pass just as they predicted." An actor replies in Bush's voice "Let me eat cake."

The scene is an aerial shot of a flooded New Orleans with the cheery caption "Welcome to Lake Bush." A voice-over says "Deluded and out of touch as Marie Antoinette was, at least she wanted the commoners to have some cake rather than eat it all herself."

Yes, I know, Antoinette never actually said "Let them eat cake," and actually showed some degree of concern for her subjects. Which is more than Bush has ever done. But most people think she did, and that's what matters when getting the message across.