Thursday, September 29, 2005

Another Immorality Tale

My previous post was an immorality tale about Christianity. Here is another.

If you follow a particular sect of Trinitarian Christianity (by which I mean that you have God-God and Holy-Ghost-God and Jesus-God and they are all different but yet the same and Jesus-God is the redeemer of your sins) then substitute that sect in the tale below because all of those sects are all equally immoral. If you are not a Trinitarian Christian then pick the Trinitarian sect you dislike most and substitute that in the tale below.

The tale of Joe Minimal, Sister Mary, and Ms Good

Joe Minimal is a Trinitarian Christian (he believes Christ will redeem his sins) of whichever sect you have chosen for this story. He goes to church every Sunday. He does everything the church specifically asks him to. But, like most working-class people under the Bush regime, he is so overstretched (he's working two full-time jobs to support his family and still only barely making ends meet to pay for essentials, let alone luxuries) that he can't volunteer for much in the way of extra church activities. He can't spare the time. He doesn't have any spare money to put on the collection plate (but he does anyway and goes without).

Sister Mary is also of whichever sect you have chosen for this story. If that sect has nuns then she really is a nun. If that sect does not have nuns then the appelation "Sister Mary" is something that has been given to her as being similar to "Mother Theresa." She does good works. She saves lives. She rescues people from poverty. And she preaches her religion to those she has helped. She doesn't make converting to her religion a condition of receiving her help but she tries very hard to make the people she helps convert.

Ms Good is an atheist. She doesn't believe in any supernatural, invisible sky beings. But, like Sister Mary, she does good works. She saves lives. She rescues people from poverty. But she doesn't bring any religion into things.

As it happens, for every life Sister Mary saves Ms Good saves a hundred lives. For every person Sister Mary rescues from poverty Ms Good rescues a hundred people from poverty. I could (since I am the author of this story) state that Sister Mary's religion makes her one hundred times less effective than Ms Good because Sister Mary has to spend so much time praying instead of doing things. I could state that Sister Mary's religion makes her one hundred times less effective than Ms Good because Sister Mary's religion poisons her critical thinking and leads her to bad decisions. Instead I shall simply note that Ms Good is one hundred times more effective than Sister Mary and leave it as an unexplained fact. Perhaps Sister Magdalene, should she appear, would be even more effective than Ms Good and religion or lack of religion is not the determining factor of effectiveness. But in this tale we have only Sister Mary and Ms Good, and Ms Good is a hundred times more effective than Sister Mary for whatever reason.

Sister Mary preaches to all those she helps. She preaches very hard. Even so, only one in ten of those people convert to her sect (some are already of that sect, some are Christians of other sects, some are of other religions, and some simply refuse to convert). Ms Good doesn't preach to anyone, but of those she helps two in one thousand spontaneously decide to convert to the creed that Sister Mary follows (because Sister Mary gets more publicity and so the people Ms Good helps naturally think she's of Sister Mary's sect). So for every ten people Sister Mary helps she gets one convert. For every ten people Sister Mary helps Ms Good helps 1,000 people and two of those convert to Sister Mary's creed. Every day, for each convert Sister Mary gains by her own efforts Ms Good (helping one hundred times more people) ends up gaining Sister Mary's creed two converts. If you were of Sister Mary's creed and wanted to convert as many people as possible you'd do best to give your spare cash to the atheistic Ms Good rather than Sister Mary.

Sister Mary and Ms Good are in a large city about to be presented honours for their humanitarian works. Joe Minimal is one of the security guards at the event. A terrorist detonates a bomb at that event. All three are killed. So where does "Christian morality" decree these three end up?

Joe Minimal, as a devout believer, goes to eternal bliss (akin to a perpetual orgasm but without the wet spot) in Heaven. He may have done the very minimum (not through choice but through circumstance) to get into Heaven but that's where he ends up.

Sister Mary, as a devout believer, also goes to eternal bliss in Heaven. Despite having devoted far more of her life to helping others, despite having converted many thousands to her faith while Joe has converted nobody, she gets nothing that Joe doesn't get. Bliss is bliss, orgasm is orgasm, and eternity is eternity. There is no "bliss premium edition" and nothing can last longer than eternity. All that extra effort but no extra reward. Doesn't sound quite right to me but that's how the system supposedly works.

Ms Good, as an atheist, burns in the fires of Hell for eternity. It doesn't matter that she saved a hundred lives for every life that Sister Mary saved. It doesn't matter that she rescued a hundred people from poverty for every person that Sister Mary rescued. It doesn't matter that each day, for every soul that Sister Mary deliberately converted to her faith that Ms Good happened (through no efforts of her own) to convert two souls to Sister Mary's faith. By anybody's reasoning Ms Good did more for humanity and more for Sister Mary's own faith than Sister Mary did.

You want to call that morality? Seriously? If you are a Trinitarian Christian I expect you do. I have had Christians tell me that because Oklahoma City bomber Timothy McVeigh converted to Christianity that despite the deaths he supposedly caused (his truck bomb could not have done the damage, which was caused by explosives planted inside the building) that it was only right that he go to Heaven despite his previous evil acts. Doing evil then converting to Christianity is a ticket to Heaven; doing good as an atheist is a ticket to Hell. That is so moral...

As the author of the story I have a surprise twist in the ending. When the bomb went off, Joe Minimal was killed instantly (so as a believer he went to Heaven). When the bomb went off, Ms Good was killed instantly (so as an atheist she went to Hell). Sister Mary, although mortally wounded, survived for a few minutes. As she looked at the carnage, at the dead bodies, at the children in the audience who were blown into a bloody pulp, she wondered how God could permit such a thing. In her final few minutes, Sister Mary lost her faith. If she had survived yet another minute she might have rationalized it all away and regained her faith, but she died wondering how God could be so cruel as to permit such a thing to happen.

All Sister Mary's faith over her many years of her life and all her good works over decades of life count for nothing. For a couple of minutes of doubt at the end of her life, her previous lifetime of faith and good works are wiped out and she burns in Hell for eternity. Burn, baby, burn.

If you think that is moral then you are a sick fuck with shit for brains who believes in a supernatural, invisible sky being with the morals of a crystal meth addict who was an evil fuck even before he became addicted. You tell me that because I am atheist I am destined for Hell. But if you're right that there is a God (you're not) and that's how God really works then however physically unpleasant Hell may be at least I'll be comforted by not having to spend an eternity adoring a sick fuck like your God.

Seriously. If God exists and really does work that way then your God has the attributes you give to your anti-God you call Satan. The evil nature that you ascribe to Satan could come up with a scheme like that but a God of love could not. Good person who does not believe goes to Hell; bad person who does believe goes to Heaven. Sounds like something only Satan could come up with in order to reward the bad people who believe in him.

Have fun when you pray to the Easter Bunny the Tooth Fairy Santa Claus Mumbo Jumbo, Lord of the Congo God and ask him/her/it to resolve the doubts my post raised in your mind.


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